Stimulus News: Today is the Day!
Filed under: $900 government payment, $900 stimulus package ftw, Global financial crisis, Shirtweek- the best blog in australia references!, Stimulus Package News
So today is the last scheduled day for receiving the $900. I’m not sure whether that means this is the last day they are sending them, or this is the last day people receive…either way, if you haven’t got your money, and you entitled to it…get your dialling finger ready!!
1300 686 636!!!!!!!!!!
Here is some listening music for while you are on hold…
Stimulus Suggestion: Go on a Somali Cruise
Filed under: $900 government payment, $900 stimulus package ftw, $950, Economic Stimulus Payment, Global financial crisis, How will I get my $900 stimulus payment?, Shirtweek- the best blog in australia references!, Stimulus Package Suggestion, Stimulus Season, Uncategorized, When will I get my $900 stimulus payment?
I have just been passed this amazing suggestion by my lame co-worker! He has found a site that are selling Somali cruises that “sail up and down the coast of Somalia waiting to get hijacked by pirates”. I mean everyone is looking for a bit of adventure aren’t they?
They even, “guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund half your money back, including gun rental charges and any unused ammo (mini gun charges not included)“. Anyways it made me chuckle on this fine Friday afternoon. I hope that if you haven’t got your money yet that it comes in the next day!!1!!
Somalian Pirate Flag
Stimulation has occured!! I am stimulated!!
Filed under: $900 stimulus package ftw, Stimulus Package News, Stimulus Season, When will I get my $900 stimulus payment?
It’s finally happened! Last night in my sleep Kevin Rudd graced me with his presence/presents and stimulated me!! Hooray!
So everyone that hasn’t received their money yet…don’t worry…I’m sure it’s on its way! It was the first time I’ve been stimulated by someone named Kevin and for the most part it was pretty painless (the wait nearly killed me though!).
If you are unsure about your payment…give the ATO a call on -1300 686 636!! Tell them Kruddler sent you!! No, probably don’t do that!
kevin rudd stimulation
Stimulus Suggestion- Lucid Dreaming!
Filed under: $900 stimulus package ftw, Global financial crisis, Stimulus Package Suggestion, Stimulus Season
I’m sure many of you (like myself) come home after a long day at work and love to relax! I find that there is no better way to end AND start the day than with a great sleep. I enjoy sleep, I won’t lie to you. Some days when I wake I wish that I was a professional sleeper, or some kind of insomnia medication tester! Anyways, I thought…how can I enjoy sleep even more?! LUCID DREAMING OF COURSE!!! For those of you who don’t know what it is, it’s when you are aware that you are dreaming and can actively participate and often manipulate the dream world and it’s surroundings!! Like last night I was on on a holiday with your mum in Las Vegas but that got kinda boring (you know how your mum can get!) so I turned into a jet-plane, bombed the Russians and then crashed into the sun. It’s awesome, so today I propose you buy a copy of Lucid Dreams in 30 days…it’s only $8.76 (US+P/H)! Deal! Maybe we can just lucid dream the whole way through the GFC!!
Stimulate your dreams!!!
Stimulus News- A “stimulus leak” from inside the ATO!
Filed under: $900 government payment, $900 stimulus package ftw, Economic Stimulus Package, Stimulus Package News
Thanks to MB, we have a link to a news.com.au article “ATO insider on the tax bonus payments timetable“. This outlies all kinds of crazy info from an ATO employee (apparently). Anyways, the main points are…
1. A bungle has meant some payments have gone to the wrong place;
2. ”Thousands of people” have incorrect details with the ATO and could be missing out;
3. He claims the ATO isn’t keeping track of calls to the hotline from people asking what’s going on;
4. He reckons people have had PLENTY of time to get their act together and should really stop complaining.
Who knows what it means, if it’s real or what, but I thought I would post it!
Day 16 and still no stimulation!
Important postcode news!
Filed under: $900 stimulus package ftw, How will I get my $900 stimulus payment?, Stimulus Package News
I have decided to post all of the postcodes that I have received over the past week on this page and on the Receivers page. I am also claiming that I have managed to work out the algorithm for the sending out of stimulus packages! LOLZER. Well it’s day 9 and I still haven’t got my money! My lame co-worker and my boss got their money today!! So not keen! I need some hope!!
Day 7 of the Stimulus Season…I suggest some relaxation!
Filed under: $900, $900 stimulus package ftw, How will I get my $900 stimulus payment?, Stimulus Package Suggestion, When will I get my $900 stimulus payment?
Well I’ve just arrived back to work after the 4 day weekend and am not too keen. I also have not received my $900!! You would think after all this advocating the $900 that the Ruddz would want to expodite it to me…or give me one of these mysterious triple payments that some people are talking about! Anyways, I actually had somebody Twitter me and recommend that I purchase one of their relaxation packages! So I had a look, and it turns out you can get a chocolate massage that costs $185 for 2 hours. To be honest, I am a large chocolate fan and the thought that I can pay a possibly attractive woman to massage chocolate onto me for 2 hours warms my soul! Anyways, I think they are giving away a $1000 of massages if you sign up for their newsletter! I was stoked that someone actually approached me with their own idea…it’s a shame they didn’t give me a free massage!!! Come on!!
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- Chocolate simulation!
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- Applying the chocolate…
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- I’m assuming this is how you feel after your chocolate massage!
Happy Easter Stimulation! Predicting when you will get your package!!
Filed under: $900 stimulus package ftw, How will I get my $900 stimulus payment?, Stimulus Season, When will I get my $900 stimulus payment?
So I’ve had a few emails from people that have received their very own stimulus package!!!!!!!! Hooray! They have been updated on the “lucky ones” page, and I think I have a big enough sample to tell you if you are going to get your stimulus package soon…
Basically you have one or more of the following characterstics-
1) Love Delta Goodrem’s music, or actually BE Delta Goodrem (that’s the claim)
2) Be from NSW
3) Have the money deposited in your account
4) Like to eat peanuts
5) Be the actual “Sharona” that The Knacks are singing about in the classic “My Sharona”
6) Be Kate’s mum or a direct blood relative of Kate.
I hope for your sake, that you fit this profile. I’m thinking I have quite a wait on my hands!!
Also, is it weird to put jam on a hot cross bun? I think it is! But maybe I’m the weird one?!And seeing as it’s Easter, here is an awesome Easter pictures!
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- Jesus+Stimulus Package=Awesome
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- Jesus+Stimulus Package=Awesome
Stimulus Suggestion- Rope-less Skipping rope
Filed under: $900 stimulus package ftw, 900 stimulus package, Stimulus Package Suggestion, Stimulus Season, When will I get my $900 stimulus payment?
I don’t know about you, but the main reason that I don’t do a whole lot more skipping, is because of that pesky rope! (*loud voice*) Well do I have the product for you…..Introducing the Jump Snap!!(/end loud voice) To be honest with you, when my lame co-worker showed me this, I thought it was fake. It is a skipping rope, that doesn’t have a rope,that’s it. Also, from what I can gather, it apparently has a “computer” that tells you how you are doing, how many skips you’ve done and how many calories you’ve burned. They are like$40US, but I’m sure “Moira” will be selling them soon, so hold onto your money til then!! Also— Stimuluation Season DAY 2..Still no money!!
A coffin.
Filed under: $900 stimulus package ftw, 900 stimulus package, When will I get my $900 stimulus payment?
There is a lot of frivolity that goes on around this website, and I guess there has been an outcry for some serious suggestions. Well I received a delightful tip-off from one of BM900’s wonderful Twitter followers! She suggested to think ahead and buy yourself your very own coffin! I mean when you think about it, you probably won’t get to choose it, and well you will end up spending a lot of time in it! Think of your loved ones and the torment they will have to go through picking out a coffin for their son/daughter/secret lover/mother/un-loved middle child/step-father Steve, and buy your own coffin today!!! Actually, I think I would buy this one off Ebay cause it kinda looks used(which is awesome!), and well I would have enough money left over for a chainsaw, flamethrower and jackhammer, cause seriously who’s NOT afraid of being buried alive?!
A smart man once said
"Give a man $900 and he can eat for a week, tell a man to vote Liberal and he wouldn't have needed the $900 to begin with."
